so....

So i have come to the conclusion that I am not really interested in findin anything right now in this point in time. If i get my hopes up that some good guy is gonna come along and they don't show up hahaha i can't be disapointed. I am now just trying very hard to be patient. I know God is teaching me something through this, but i can tell you one thing... there are too many jerks in this world. I am just kicking back for now and just having fun. When God feels its the right time i know that special someone will just walk into my life, but until then i am not going to worry about it. I have been hurting again inside missing someone to hold and to care for. I guess i just have too much of that giving nature. I don't know how to just be by myself ha thats funny though because all throughout highschool i did it... but know that i am older i feel like i am running out of time even though i am still so young to so many people. I feel older mentally so it just hurts more i guess. I had a good prayer time with my friend Diana last night who is going through the same struggles i am and its funny how friends can sometimes go through it at the same time. I know God allows that so we can be a comfort to each other, but dang... does it hurt. haha. I am ready to hit the ground running after some dream just wish i knew which one... I am really praying and thinking about the Coast Guard idea i have. Medical training and what not available in there and whatever else might grab my interest. It would give me an opportunity to see some more of the U.S. how cool would that be?